Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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