I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
Farmville is her only friend.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
