See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
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