whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
I've got a whole match.com system. Triple book. First dates always get the 6pm happy hour drinks slot. 8pm dinner goes to a girl where I think I can close the deal. 10pm slot goes to the sure thing in case of emergency, but 6 can always trump 8 and 8 always trumps 10. Just blame it on a dead iPhone battery.
That, my friend, is how I bang 50 new girls a year. Not luck at all. It's science and statistics.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Randomize