I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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