i just google imaged poop.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
Randomize
