Whatcha textin bout Willis?
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
