You were right. It hurts to walk today.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
