: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
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