And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Randomize
