I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
