Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
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