I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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