My friends, they love my intelligence
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
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