i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Randomize
