So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Randomize
