Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
Randomize