If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Randomize
