YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize
