Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Someone signed my nipple.
Randomize