But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
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