Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Just pee around me
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Randomize
