well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize