just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
