She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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