It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
Randomize