Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
