M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
