who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Randomize