Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
i will never coherently bang her
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Randomize
