I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
