I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
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