Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
