We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
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