Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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