she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
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