Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Randomize
