Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
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