That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
Randomize
