HIV tests are more positive than that guy
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Randomize
