I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Randomize
