Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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