if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
Randomize
