Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
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