I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize
