i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Randomize
