Do you still have your period?
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Randomize