a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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