Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
