he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
