haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Randomize
